Some Things That Are Wearing On Sarge, During This Football Season!

As the football season reaches the midway point, I have found a number of things that are just wearing me out. You know, irritating, fatiguing, and burdening. Sort of like that guy that does the Southern Bullion Coin and Jewelry commercials on TV. For your entertainment purposes only, here are some football things that are wearing on Sarge.

1) Bama throwing makes me throw up! Alabama has, possibly, the best pair of running backs ever to play together in the same backfield. Yet, who knows why they don't pound the rock with Ingram and Richardson. When they lost to South Carolina, the ratio was 17 carries for Ingram and Richardson combined compared to 35 pass attempts and 12 rushing attempts by McElroy - which of course the majority of those rushes were pass plays that turned into sacks or scrambles. Final ratio - Ingram + Richardson = 17 carries as to 47 plays that were passes or McElroy. WHAT! WHY? They trailed the whole game but in the first minute of the 4th qtr the lead was only 7.

Even in the rout of Tennessee, they attempted more passes than Ingram and Richardson got carries - McElroy attempted 32 passes to 26 combine carries for Ingram and Richardson...WHY? Their offensive line is great and these backs are great. MAKE TEAMS STOP THEM AND YOU WILL FIND THAT USUALLY THEY CAN'T! Ingram - 85 carries for 544 yards and 6.4 yards per carry on the season. Richardson - 86 carries for 606 yards and 7 yards a carry on the season. POUND THE ROCK, BAMA! Then work play action with EASE!

2) Dripping with Sarcasm, I CAN'T FUNCTION NOT KNOWING IF BRETT IS GOING TO BE ABLE TO KEEP THE STREAK ALIVE! I love Brett Favre the warrior but I can't stand the Drama Queen and now he is exacerbating injuries to have excuses for poor play. I know his ankle has given him problems. The pictures of it on the internet after last season's NFC Championship Game were proof that it was hurt. Sunday night against the Packers, Favre's ankle got tweaked. He began to limp all over Lambeau Field like he could hardly walk. OK, I am sure it didn't feel good. Only one problem, when he needed to run or scramble there was no limp what so ever. Watch the last few plays. He moved with no restriction at all during plays then limped like he was cripple after plays were over, as well as, in the post game interviews. In the post game interviews, he mentioned he may not be able to play the next game. DUDE, QUIT BEGGING FOR SYMPATHY! QUIT HAMMING IT UP SO YOUR FANS WILL SAY, "LOOK WHAT A GREAT WARRIOR HE IS. BARELY ABLE TO WALK BUT STILL OUT THERE TRYING." Sorry Brett, but if you limp that bad while walking, you have to limp that bad while scrambling or running. Then again this is par for the course for what we all know to be the biggest drama queen of them all. Still, quit faking the injury to be worse than it really is. Update - An MRI has revealed 2 small fractures in Favre's ankle but he is listed as DAY TO DAY on the injury report, just like me and you are in our jobs. Again, I stand by the eyeball test during the game that showed he couldn't hardly walk but he could run and scramble. HAM!

3) Jerry Jones, please just call yourself Coach. The Cowboys continue to struggle and the reason is so simple. Sarge has laughed about this for a couple of years now. Jerry is a great owner and business man, just look at his checking account. However, he can't get out of the way so a real coach can take them to the top. The boys have great talent but no "football leadership" because Jerry wants all the credit for building and coaching this team. Hand puppet coach, Wade Phillips, made his team promise to give a full effort every game after they beat the Texans. REAL COACHES DON'T MAKE THEIR TEAM PROMISE - THEY DEMAND THEIR TEAM GIVE FULL EFFORT OR CHANGES ARE MADE! So Jerry Jones, we all know you are the coach of this team. Please, start claiming the title that you demand. Do the press conferences, put it on the roster, acknowledge it in public, and give yourself credit for that losing record as HEAD COACH. But don't change a thing - the entertainment of a brilliant, rich guy too stupid to realize he is the reason his team loses is priceless.

4) Rex Ryan, his cocky attitude, and loud mouth. Rex is a good coach with a good team. However, THEY HAVEN'T DONE JACK SQUAT, YET! Rex, you can run your mouth all you want when you win the ring. Until then, shut up! And tell your team to shut up also. PAPER CHAMPIONS!

5) B(ull) C(rapping) S(illiness) - Yes, the agonizing talk of the BCS has begun. I CAN'T TAKE IT ANYMORE! Why should I have to figure out who the best is based on 3 polls and a computer poll or whatever there is? IT CAN FIGURE ITSELF OUT ON THE FIELD - JUST LOOK AT EVERY OTHER MAJOR CHAMPIONSHIP IN COLLEGE AND PRO. I become more and more disgusted with this every year and take college football less and less serious every year. SORRY, IT IS JUST RIDICULOUS AND WE DON'T HAVE TO TAKE IT AS FANS. AND I WON'T!

6) Tom Brady's Hair! Tom, you are my favorite player. One of my favorite players of all time. But Dude, that MOP on your head is just BRUTAL. Let me guess, your Brazilian wife thought it would look cool. Dude, it is ok to grow it out, BUT STYLE IT, DO SOMETHING WITH IT! Here's an idea, Tom. When it is long enough, get it all cut off and allow it to be used to make wigs for cancer patients.

7) Oregon Duck's CRAP-i-forms! I mean uniforms. Green and yellow can be good looking colors together. Just look at the Oakland A's baseball uniforms of the 1970's. But the Ducks uniforms, look like Duck POOP! Hey Nike, quit showing how bad your design department can really be. GIVE THE DUCKS SOME REAL UNIFORMS, THAT SCREAM FOOTBALL INSTEAD OF FUTURISTIC ROLLER DERBY!